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Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Frock Rocker Rants - the background and disclaimer

So, let's just get one thing out of the way...I am a huge fucking cliche. Songs have been written about me...I have been immortalized in film...I am every daddy's nightmare. I am the girl who packed her car and drove west for the shining lights of Hollywood to become a fucking rock star. That's right I'm mama's fallen angel who after growing up tall and growing up right headed west 'cause she thought a change would do her good. That was almost seven years ago...and it's high time I started writing about it...if for no other reason than to make sense of what has become of my life. I should warn you...I have a standard issue musician mouth...in essence I speak in trailer hooker tongue. If this offends you...go read a fucking blog about gardening or debutante balls...both subjects I personally find deeply interesting...but only if I can talk about how fucking beautiful the rhododendrons look lining the walk way of hand laid stone. Anyways, more to follow about gardening...but for now...quick background for the purpose of perspective.

I'm the daughter of a midwestern judge. My mother is the kindest person I know. I have an older brother, who is now also a judge. It is my brother's fault that I pursued rock stardom. When I began to express an interest in playing guitar at 14, my brother said...and I quote "you'll never get a guitar...and if you do...you'll never learn to play...and if you do learn to play...you'll never play in a band." I was an obstinate child. Such doubt as my brother expressed sealed my future as a musician in a family full of lawyers. Had my brother never uttered such words, I'm certain I would be a high powered divorce attorney raking in bigtime Chicago money...my father would be proud...my brother would be proud...my mother would still pray for me. As is, they all pray for me...and they still want me to go to law school. I took the LSAT to whet their appetite...I scored a 167. Then, instead of applying, I joined a punk band. I'm still trying to decide whether this was the smartest or the dumbest decision I've ever made.