My Thing, You See

I have a thing you see,
For the insensible ones
That incinerate my heart
With averted glances and
Throwaway notes.
They are my addiction
My karma
For the casual disposal
Of kinder companions
Done away with
To facilitate
My sui generis status
Amongst friends and family.
I have lynched that life of
Ice cream socials and
Egg nog parties with
Big fish in small ponds
For a freedom foreshadowed
By that which it now contains.
Those averted glances
Thrown my way
And notes replaced with
Glowing pixels
Broken down and
Re-assembled into half words,
And passing thoughts that
Drift away with the lightest
Summer breeze
Leaving me
Aching.